Prayer Request and a Question

[Champuru]

I hate to ask for prayers for myself, but this is a biggie, so I'm going to put it out there.

I recently underwent surgery (D&C, laparoscopy, hysteroscopy, and a chromopertubation) and they found that I have a condition called endometriosis. Basically, the end result is infertility or difficulty conceiving. My ob/gyn said that our "best bet" for conceiving would be invitro.

We've been married for 12 years now and happily so. For some couples, having children is a goal -- not so for us, although we were hoping that it was in God's plan for us to have at least one. Our lives are already filled to overflowing and having child(ren) would be an additional blessing.

Now, my question is about invitro. I'm wondering if that is like forcing the hand of God, so to speak? (Although, is it really possible force God's hand?) We don't want to do anything that would be an affront to the Lord, yet if this is a means by which to achieve His will for us, we don't want to discount it.

Hubby and I are definitely taking this to prayer and I'm asking those who may, we covet your prayers as well. We know, ultimately, that whatever happens is for our best. May we have the wisdom and understanding to accept it, knowing that it's His good and perfect plan for our lives.

Thanks.

[scrivener]

I have a lot to say about this, but most of it is in a long email I'm working on. Let me just say this here: You cannot "force the hand of God." If you could, he wouldn't be God. If you want kids, and science makes it possible for you to have them, going that route is not in itself wrong. If you would use birth control to avoid having kids, using in vitro fertilization in order to conceive is not much more "interfering."

Now, the science could be at odds with your values, and that is an issue to keep in mind. They fertilize a bunch of eggs and they implant several; if they all stick, extras are destroyed, unless you want to carry them all to term, which some people have done. I have mixed feelings about this.

[Champuru]

Now, the science could be at odds with your values, and that is an issue to keep in mind. They fertilize a bunch of eggs and they implant several; if they all stick, extras are destroyed, unless you want to carry them all to term, which some people have done. I have mixed feelings about this.

This is one of the issues that I am concerned about. A friend who is also struggling with infertility told me that multiple births are extremely likely with in vitro and also highly discouraged for the health of the baby. Of course, abortion is not something I'd like to consider, so what to do when they tell me that I'm expecting -- triplets -- and that we need to terminate two? I would loathe to be faced with such a decision.

It's amazing how many issues arise to shake the foundations of my faith and beliefs with just this one topic.

I am looking forward to reading more of your thoughts on this subject, Scrivener! Thank you.

[1stwahine]

Donna, As I stated at HT, ask about Clomid. I had two children using that simple procedure taking it. I'm living proof and they are well and productive adults!

Lynn

[Champuru]

I can't believe it's been 8 months since I posted this message about our thoughts/concerns about IVF. It's amazing how time flies when you're not conscious of it.

We still have not proceeded with the treatment and still covet your prayers and advice.

It's scary since it seems like 12 years (of marriage) passed in the blink of an eye. Unfortunately, I can't let another 12 years go by to get serious about having children.

[Mark From Hawaii]

Donna,

Before we had kids my wife had a weird growth on one of her ovaries called a dermoid. According to her Ob/Gyn this thing had hair and teeth!?! Anyway, she had to have the affected ovary removed as it was causing some pain. The doctor said it may be doubtful that we would have kids; this happened about 4 years after we were married. We "tried" for a while for about a year - you know, conciously trying to have. But when we gave up and just let things happen, the Lord blessed us in His own time frame. And now we have two! So anyway, there still may be hope for you that it will happen without IVF, but if that's what God is calling you to do, go for it. I will pray that He gives you the guidance, strength and courage you are seeking.

Yours in Christ,
Mark

[Champuru]

Thanks for your encouaging words, Mark.

I really would like to have a child the good old-fashioned way without specialists, hormone treatments, and implantations involved. To be honest, we haven't really have TRIED, I mean consciously tried, and I am praying that if we do start that process, that in the Lord's timing, that He will bless us with a child. My ob/gyn keeps pressuring me, however. And I didn't think 32 was all that old.

I have also heard many people say not to try too hard and just let it happen -- but we've been doing that for 12 years and that method hasn't worked for us yet.

What a testimony to be able to say, "the doc said that it would be really difficult, but it's all God!" You are blessed! I pray that I will be able to say the same someday, too.

[scrivener]

Praying for you all week, Donna.

[Pua'i]

(((raises Donna up in prayer)))

[Champuru]

Thanks for your prayers! I've been recording the entire process on my site at http://www.champuru.net/blog

I've been struggling with the whole waiting thing... the embryos were transferred on January 4 and we will do a pregnancy test on Jan. 14 and another on the 16th. In the meantime, all I can do is wait. I'm trying not to worry, to leave it all in God's capable hands, but my tendency to worry is sometimes stronger than my faith.

I truly appreciate the prayers from the HawaiiBeliever ohana as well as others around the blogosphere. I hope to have some good news to share next week!